It's about Availability not Ability When it Comes to My Relationship with God

I realized today that being raised in the church is both a blessing and a curse. As I've been dealing with the issues I have in my life, all of them keep pointing to God as the solution. I understand that and agree that he is the solution. However, I've never had to put any effort into having a relationship with God. Growing up, the system of church and youth group my parents put me into built my relationship with God. Then I went to a Christian college for 4 years where the system kept me close to God. When I graduated college and left these faith systems, I quickly fell away from God.

It's been 7 years and I've been in and out of my faith in God many times. Some years I cursed him and refused his love. Some years I clung to him and relied on him for hope. Ultimately though, I've always come back to the understanding that I believe in God and want him to guide my life but wasn't sure how to truly make that happen.

Today I spoke to my friend, Ryan, about this struggle to be in a true relationship with God. I asked him how he keeps his faith so strong and I got my money's worth from his response.

He drew this diagram...

This image illustrates my "position" in Christ. It shows that once I became a Christian, the Bible says that I am IN Christ. Nothing I can do at that point can change my position in Christ. God now views me through Jesus Christ who died to purify and connect me to God. So, that's all good!

Then he drew the next diagram...

This diagram illustrates that Christ is also in ME. However, this is my "condition" and unlike my "position" in Christ, Christ's "condition" in me is ever changing. There are 5 "means of growth" that help grow Christ's presence in me...

1) Pray

2) Spend time reading the bible

3) Hang out with other Christians

4) Serve - Volunteer

5) Suffer

The more of these things that engage me, the more likely Christ's presence inside of me is to expand and eventually, this expansion will change the way I think, act, feel, walk and talk. I'll start to resemble Jesus in a very organic way.

My first reaction to this was, "okay... I need to get to work and do these things." Ryan was quick to point out that this isn't about what I do though. Yes, I have to take steps and make an effort but letting Christ grow inside of me is not about my "ability." It's about my "availability." I think I understand this but will need to think more about it.

Ultimately though, I know my idols have to change and I have to find my self-worth in God and not in my accomplishments. Until today, I was under the impression that I had to draw close to God and change my view/perspective on money and how I view myself. Now I realize that I just have to make myself "available" to God and he'll do the rest.

Ryan summarized this understanding with a famous sermon titled, "The expulsive power of a new affection."

In other words, I won't be able to "change" myself through my abilities which was exactly my first reaction. I have to let God grow his presence in my life through an increase in availability and that will remove my reliance on worldly achievements to give my life meaning.